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What not to say… August 24, 2009

Posted by Natasha in Infertility, Rants.
Tags: , , , , ,


Me: I got my beta result today. Negative. Huge surprise there.

Her: Oh, sorry to hear that. If it makes you feel any better, I wish I wasn’t pregnant.


(I really wish I had made this conversation up)


What ridiculous things have people said to you?



1. M - August 24, 2009

that’s hideous. i hope you kicked her! (or at least told her what a horrendous thing just came out of her mouth…. probably more mature, but not as satisfying)

i don’t have anything that comes close to comparing… but i’m getting pretty sick of the “oh well, there’s always next cycle, right?” comment.

2. Lisa RM - August 25, 2009

Really?! Some people.

3. Egg Factory - August 25, 2009

That’s just about the most insensitive thing I’ve ever heard someone say. It’s one thing to turn the other cheek, but I think she deserved a swift slap across her face. How you had any composure at all is a true test of what an awesome person you must be. I probably would have gotten physical.

4. Wishing4One - August 25, 2009

so when she regained consciousness and was up off the floor, what did she say? people just don’t think before speaking sometimes…

5. jill - August 26, 2009

Whoa… that is terrible. What a jerk.

6. Beautiful Mess - August 26, 2009


What the…..seriously?! How are people so rude AND dumb?! I’m really sorry!

7. kathi - August 27, 2009

I cannot believe that anyone with a functioning brain… and heart… could think that would be comforting in any way, on any planet. Sorry you had to be on the receiving end of such a clueless statement šŸ˜¦

:: ICLW ::

8. Annissa - August 28, 2009

OOOOOOH MYYYYYYYYYYYY …. and she’s still alive???? Seriously – I give you a ton of credit for not killing her fool behind!

Happy ICLW šŸ™‚

9. DaniGirl - September 10, 2009

Ugh, people are so stupid sometimes. That’s about the worst I’ve heard, though!

When we were going through our IVF and in the midst of the 2ww, I was talking to a colleague about the cost and she said, “Oh my god, that’s so much money!” I was nodding in agreement when she continued “Think of the vacation you could have taken instead.” Another woman, when we found out we were pregnant natually with our second child after using IVF for the first, said “So do you regret doing IVF now?” Um yes, I totally regret the existence of my firstborn son… duh!

10. Jen - September 21, 2009

I tend to gain weight where most of my family does-in my belly, in the front. I don’t expand to have wide hips which unfortunately at this point I’d welcome rather than the comments that I get even by well meaning people that I work with who know that we did IVF/ICSI to have our first son and have since been unsuccessful and devastated. So why then right after we made the decision to pursue adoption to complete our family did one of my coworkers come up to me and say, “Did you do that by yourself?” I looked at her and said, “Do what?” It hadn’t clicked in my brain yet. She said, “That.” and pointed to my belly. I said, “Oh babe, I’m not pregnant!” Usually my response is “I’m not pregnant just fat” which really shuts people up quick, but she really was mortified. I went on to explain that we’re moving onto adoption and she ran away as quickly as she could. Meanwhile I wanted to cry, and did on my way home after my meeting. Shoot, I’m doing it now and I feel like I should be over this.

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