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The new signals (5w3d) March 29, 2012

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Aching back? = Sit down you fool, and have a drink of water.
Twingy cramps? = Didn’t you listen when I told you I was thirsty? Drink!!
Aching boobs? = Stop working late so you can get to the shops and buy a new bra!
Feeling sick? = Eat! More! Now!

Apparently my body seems to know what it wants. Hopefully that means it knows what to do as well.

I’m making the change from Crinone to Pessaries tomorrow. At $200 a week, there is no way I could continue that. Hopefully things stay stable.

This week has been tough – 10 hour work day, 14 hour work/uni day, 10 hour work day. Far too little sleep. Holidays next week will be bliss!!

2 weeks today until my scan!!

3356! (5w1d) March 27, 2012

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Beta #3 just came in – 3356! Progesterone has climbed nicely as well. Things are looking great! Still doubling at about the 36 hour mark, which is wonderfully reassuring.

I’ve had quite a lot of stretchy, pulling pain – nothing severe, just enough to make me notice my general abdominal area. It seems to be yet another reminder to drink more! (As if I’m not in the loo often enough as is!)

My WTEWYE app informs me this morning that bubs is the size of a sweet pea. I think I sense a new nickname coming on 🙂

5 weeks March 26, 2012

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It feels like such a milestone. I suppose in some ways it is.

The symptoms have hit me hard today – but at the risk of sounding like a sucky pregnant woman – I am so glad for them, they keep me sane, keep me believing that there really is a miniature baby in there.

 

At Five Weeks, I am…

  • Exhausted
  • Always in the loo (yes, still checking to make sure things haven’t gone wrong)
  • Nauseous from about lunch time onwards
  • Not needing to poke my boobs to know they’re sore
  • Constantly thirsty
  • Genuinely excited, but still a little scared
  • Not sure how I’m going to cope with uni this semester
  • Feeling very loved by the people around me who are so, so excited for us
  • Still waking up all night long

 

About progesterone (4w6d) March 25, 2012

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The more I think about it, the more I believe that my first loss was due to a progesterone deficiency. My clinic’s protocol is to stop supplementation at day 16 after EPU – 4w2d. Last time, i stopped at 4+1, 2 days later I started bleeding. This time, I insisted on staying on it, and they let me. When I had the spotting at 4+1, they even recommended doubling the crinone dosage! My P4 levels on Friday were 35 (should be above 30) – so good, but not extremely high. This is with supplementation twice a day. I can only imagine what could have happened if I had stopped. With every clinic I can google recommending support throughout trimester one, at least until 10 weeks, WHY does my clinic stop people at 4?!?

4w5d March 24, 2012

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A nicely uneventful day, although Melbourne’s idea of early autumn was a whole lot more like the middle of winter than I would have liked!

Spent most of the day feeling vaguely queasy – it is still disconcerting feeling sick and not actually being “Ill”. I *never* get nauseated, and only once in my life prior to today had I been sick somewhere other than home. It’s like my superpower. It was one of the things about pregnancy that I had been worried about. Yet oddly, it’s different to being ‘normal’ sick. A) I’m happy about it, but B) it’s actually not as bad. I can’t quite explain it, but it does feel different.

I still can’t quite wrap my head around the idea that there is a baby in there. Yes, I’m pregnant, I think that’s sunk in… But pregnancy = baby?? Not so much, in my head.

Upcoming:
27/3: beta #3
3/4: beta #4
5/4: our third anniversary
12/4: 1st Scan
16/4: Final FS appointment
23/4: 1st obs appointment

I still feel like I’m playing make-believe!!

Reading over this post, and my earlier ones… I don’t sound especially happy. I am, so completely and utterly happy to the very core of my being… But it is so very abstract. Pregnant? *Me*? Really? I wonder when it will feel real.

A history of pee-sticks March 23, 2012

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20120323-185004.jpg

8 days ago, I peed on a stick for the first time this cycle. This afternoon, I saw a sight I never thought I would see. A blazingly dark line, at least twice as dark as the control.

Happiness doesn’t begin to describe it!

4w4d March 23, 2012

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After a long wait this afternoon, I am thrilled with a result of 552 for beta #2!!

Hooray!!

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Surprising, and yet kind of not… March 22, 2012

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I never thought I would be so happy to throw up. I have done it twice in the last ten years (migraine in 2002 and food poisoning in 2008). And yet, crouching there, feeling so rotten, I was thrilled. That maybe something normal might happen to my body.

I might actually be for-real pregnant.

Although sadly I don’t think I’ll ever feel quite the same about Thai 🙂

Awake March 22, 2012

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It’s nearly 530 am, I’ve been awake for an hour. I even pushed out bed time, so I don’t think it’s that. Crazy hormones!

Still no more spotting, thank goodness!

I’m also, already, the most pregnant I’ve been. Even though I officially made 4w5d last time, I had already started bleeding & cramping by the early hours of 4+3. Not quite the relief I was hoping for, but it will do. I so wish I was going in for my repeat beta today! I have to keep telling myself that every pregnancy is a wholly unique and precious little snowflake event, in no way influenced by any other pregnancy – not mine or the patients’ of Dr Google.

I had a more comfortable sleep last night, the hip/groin/ovary pain (still not sure which) seems to be eased by a pillow between my knees. Surely it’s too early for ligament stuff??

This whole process fascinates me- I thought I knew myself pretty well, but this is a new surprise every day!

Loving it March 21, 2012

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Being pregnant that is.

I’m just going to enjoy it. There is nothing today to indicate that anything is wrong.

So, in the interest of embracing this and acting like a real pregnant woman (fake it til you make it, right?), this is today.

Symptoms

So Thirsty!

Still waking at an ungodly hour, though having stopped peeing on overpriced stress devices, I can usually go back to sleep. Woke about every 90 minutes last night though, checking that everything was still ok.
Dull, achy feeling in lower abdomen, tending toward left side. Like early AF cramping, before the real deal starts. Eased by rest.
Occasional boob soreness (better today than the last few days though) – a general achy, bruise sensation if I mash them. Ahem.
Mild Nausea, followed by diarrhea (oh so lovely)
Crinone disgustingness
Sleepy, tired, overwhelming desire to curl up in my nest and not move.

After yesterday’s spotting, my nurse (possibly the sweetest girl on the planet) has recommended starting another crinone in the morning, which I have now done. There is the possibility that I may stay on these things until 12 weeks, but might be switched to pessaries if they are causing irritation. (which I think they are. The ‘clumps’ are a cherry/brown colour, but there has been no more ‘free’ blood like yesterday). I’m still scheduled for more bloods on Friday. This TWW (before a 6 week scan) is way harder than the other one!!

Waiting to hear back from FS for his opinion on metformin & PCOS in pregnancy. My reading says it can help reduce the risk of miscarriage by up to 50%, and that it has only not been proven safe in pregnancy, rather than having been proven harmful. It’s a dilemma that I am keen to hear his opinion on.

Edit: I’m staying on the Met until we see a heartbeat. Apparently it is widely widely used in countries such as South Africa, with no evidence of harm. And there is some evidence to suggest that it does help prevent MC. He wouldn’t go a far as to recommend taking it, but I didn’t get the impression he thought it was a bad idea.