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Final progesterone (10w5d) May 5, 2012

Posted by Natasha in Finally Pregnant!, IVF.
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Despite still being on a cocktail of pills (metformin & vitamins – found out earlier this week that I am severely vitamin D deficient), I just took the final dose of the drug that I credit with keeping me pregnant to this point. Particularly give the bleeding, which has slowed to occasional, very mild brown over the last couple of days, this makes me very nervous. I have no mores scripts, no more doses. I was meant to stop on Monday gone, but had been weaning down since last Saturday. Praying that the placenta is hard at work doing its job.

No more scares please, Fuzzy!

Just crazy (9 weeks) April 23, 2012

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So today the crazy lady hormones kicked in. Tears. Happiness, sadness, who-the-hell-knows-what-ness. Bizzarre. I just cried for ten minutes because I was hungry and I didn’t want to eat anything. Who *am* I?

First obs appointment today, Dr… Junior I think I’ll call him – he is seriously young! Nice guy, Mr G likes him as well. Long history taken, quick blood pressure check – and that’s it! I was seriously coveting a peek at fuzzy, but it didn’t happen. Seems I’m just a regular pregnant person! He is an IVF specialist, at the other big Melbourne clinic, so at least he gets where we’re at. Nice for a change. I desperately need to sleep.

Beta #4 (6w1d) aka relief, for now April 3, 2012

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25490! Doubling nicely, although slightly slower, still a lot quicker than the expected 96 hours. I had another bit of a worry session this morning, felt perfectly fine, not even sore-chested. This will hopefully buy me a few more days’ relief. 9 more sleeps!

Breathe March 21, 2012

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Spotting seems to have stopped.

My amazing acupuncturist gave me a copy of her new fertility affirmation CD – and it is amazing. It’s like it was written for me.

Especially the part about ‘I trust my body to deliver me a healthy, strong baby’.

And one I really liked: ‘I laugh my baby into the world’.

I’m working really hard to believe it.

The Magic Number March 20, 2012

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Is 121!!

I’m really pregnant!

The guideline I’ve been given is that they like to see at least 100 on day 16.

Today is day 15, and I’m already over that magic number.

Of course it’s no guarantee, but I am feeling a little more secure.

 

Completely amazing!

 

 

Oh, and for the other POAS junkies, I used a FRER, and counting back to when I saw my very first line, fainter than you can imagine, my HCG would have been at about the 22-25 mark. A lot higher than the 6.3 Google told me, and more like what the manufacturer said!

 

Beta Day March 20, 2012

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I’m not so scared this morning. Yesterday was pretty horrible – for no real reason that I could ascertain I had this awful feeling that everything was about to go horribly wrong.

I made the (hopefully wise) choice to not POAS this morning, so I’m blissfully unaware of how things are progressing.

I’ve had no cramping, no spotting (although tons of CM which FREAKS ME THE FUCK OUT EVERY TIME!)…

I’m still doing the ‘oh it’s 430 am, must be time to be SO VERY WIDE AWAKE. Quickly followed by READ ALL THE PREGNANCY THINGS. Habit? Anxiety? Hormones? Who knows.

Beta is being drawn in about 90 minutes. Please pray/cross fingers/wish/send vibes/interpretive dance for good news and awesome levels!

Obsession and Trust March 19, 2012

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These last few days have been difficult. The last few of the official TWW, though I don’t have bloods until tomorrow.
This morning and yesterday have both resulted in minutes of anxious heart thumping as I wait for the HPTs to reach their maximum time, willing the line to darken, yet convincing myself it’s not. (spoiler – yesterdays was eventually heaps darker, today’s is slightly darker). There is some variation in the actual test (both of yesterday’s lines were thin and sharp, today’s are thick and fuzzy). Up until now I have been pretty calm. I need to find my zen and trust my body. I have acupuncture tonight, which I am sure will help me to chill the fuck out…
I have a decent amount of queasiness, minor cramping, massive amount of exhaustion/5:00am insomnia, food aversions, super smell… The symptoms are reassuring. But when my body has failed so spectacularly for so long, and only science has saved me, I only have those little pink lines as my guide.

Trust my body.
Let it go.
Nothing bad has happened yet.

No question March 17, 2012

Posted by Natasha in Finally Pregnant!, IVF.
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The beautiful sight of a clear, lovely pink second line greeted me a few minutes ago. No disputing this one.

I’m pregnant!!

Hurdles March 16, 2012

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Deciding to try for a baby is the easy part. It’s from there on in that things get tricky.

Sex does not equal baby.

Ovulation
Sufficient, decent sperm
Doctors
Diagnosis
Money
Responding to drugs
Then more drugs
But not too much
Egg collection
Mature eggs
Fertilization
2 cells
4 cells
8 cells
Morula
Blastocyst
Transfer
More drugs
Implantation
hCG doubling
And continuing to rise adequately
Heart rate
Staying pregnant
Tests
Morph scan
Staying pregnant
Labour
Birth

Lots of hurdles to overcome.

Yep, there’s something there… March 16, 2012

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I’m not shouting from the rooftops… I don’t think Mr G even really believes it yet. But there is definitely a faint line there.
I think I might be pregnant…